30-something…

January 4th, 1972.  For all my Facebook friends whose requests for Birthday Calendars I have ignored, this is the only time I will publicly share it.  But don’t worry, I want no gifts and honestly don’t mind if you never remember it.

I have a good friend who when turning 30 celebrated declaring that he had long since past the days when he could be a cool 20-something, but he was confident about being a cool 30-something without changing a thing.

I embraced his belief as my own. And then I turned 37.

I do not project that a mid-life crisis is on the horizon. I love my beautiful wife dearly and even more, she actually loves and accepts me. I could find no better companion. I love my children more than life itself. They are a father’s greatest joy. I have a few wonderful, lifelong friends. God has been very good to me.

But there is something different about 37.

I’m not sure when it first hit me. I turned 37 the way I like to celebrate birthdays – quiet, without much pomp and circumstance, with good friends, good food, and good wine. Perhaps it is that year 38 is being lived in the worst economic crisis is my lifetime. Perspective seems a bit more accessible (and much more affordable) these days.  Maybe it has taken 37 years for me to settle on what I really like, to determine what is really worth my time and to become comfortable with who I am and who I can be.

2007 and 2008 seemed to be years of transition and crisis, as much for those around me as for me and mine. Wherever I was I believed there was somewhere else I was suppose to be.  In my mind, I moved to three different new cities and had at least two new jobs.  I developed several new theories about how life really works only to see them fail the test of time.  And as I have plodded through the first few months on 2009, I have retreated to some unexpected places in the recesses of my soul and I think I found a bit of something that had been missing.

Baseball. As a child I loved baseball.  As a Braves fan in the ‘80’s, it was a matter of discipline to watch a game, but it was love that took me to practice three nights a week.  Family vacations were spent traveling to major league parks like old Memorial Stadium in Baltimore and devouring Dodger Dogs at Chevez Ravine in LA, chasing foul balls with my dad and my brother.  In the 90’s the Braves epitomized unfulfilled potential and yet one of my favorite moments was sitting in the left field stands for game 2 of the 1995 World Series watching Glavine win his first of two games which brought Atlanta’s only World Championship.  Add to that the many years of multiple nights and tournaments playing softball and it is safe to say that “the game” was a first love only to be replaced by the love of my wife.

In recent years, however, my passion for baseball waned.  I am convinced little league tee ball and baseball killed it.  The games are three hours long with more kids picking flowers than chasing foul balls.  My kids were drawn more to the constant action soccer provided and my wife, the college soccer player, was thrilled to encourage them in that direction.  Both my attention span for “the game” and my hamstring muscles began to atrophy as I laid down my glove retiring from softball and spent only a few moments a day shedding the disappointment of box scores as the Braves struggled to find their past glory (or better said, fighting the inclination to recapture their past lethargy).  Baseball had become filler in between football seasons.

Late last summer the Braves made one last post-All Star Game charge before quickly petering out.  But during that 5 game stretch, I order the MLB plan.  It was an impulse buy.  This season I made sure to have my wife call and cancel the automatic renewal as I was very aware that tighter budgets certainly left no room for baseball.  And then I watched opening night.  The Braves win.  Hope springs eternal.  The strange thing was there was a comfort level watching the game I had not experienced in years.  The previous three seasons, I watched maybe 3 whole games.  But I found myself scrambling to undo the cancellation notice in order to watch the Braves play the second game of the season.  (“No ma’am, I am certain my wife would never actually call and cancel the subscription” – you get the point).

So far I have seen more than a dozen games this season.  Win or lose, “the game” seems to be drawing me into its slower, even majestic pace.  At 37, I have discovered I don’t just need to, but want to slow down.

My daughter turns 13 in August and presently stands 5’5”.  She is so quickly becoming a women and I can do nothing to slow the process.  My son seems to barely resemble the little boy who was so dependent on his Daddy for survival as he is ready to take on the world by himself.  And it has happened so fast.  I look in the mirror and seem to have found the 20 lbs everyone keeps trying to lose – and it’s not going anywhere.  The signs of aging show up everywhere, beckoning me to work harder and move faster in order to slow their progress.  I have the carrot of success dangling as I hit my “key earning years” and somehow I wound up on the rollercoaster I warned so many about.  Best laid plans…

And yet while “the game” like all of us has met its share of crisis and change, at its core it remains simply the same.  Perhaps that is at the heart of my renewed affair.  At 37, I desire more simplicity, more harmony; a renewed rhythm that reminds me at my core what really matters.

And in case you are wondering, the Braves have at 7:40 start time.  Chances are, I’ll be watching.

I’m Back in Blogosphere

I have found there are three types of bloggers.

The first is the “blogger as reporter”. They provide their daily musings, updates and running life commentary about whatever they believe to be important or attention worthy. These bloggers typically have a small, loyal following engulfed in their moment-by-moment thoughts and movements. Their greatest challenges are that Facebook and Twitter have significantly cut into their readership or, just as troublesome, if you miss a few posts, the backlog can seem so overwhelming that giving up outweighs catching up.  The truth is the rest of us can ‘t keep up with you so we stop trying.

The second group are “bloggers as columnists”. These distributors of Internet intellect have chosen a more modest approach of the weekly or bi-weekly rants providing a healthy dose of their world and world-view without overdoing the commitment necessary to stay current. (Many of these bloggers have made excellent use of Twitter and FB to keep the low doses of wisdom flowing to their tweets in between posts – see Ramblings as a wonderful example)

I consider myself part of the last group, “bloggers as authors”. Our posts are fewer and farther between and need certain inspiration to prompt our writings. But like a good summer read, when we come to the table we dare not disappoint. For us, we do not consider readers as loyal tweets, instead as fans, or perhaps sojourners who welcome a new entry as a fresh wind blowing on the beach begging you to stop by and share a few moments in thoughtful reflection on this stuff we call life.

With that disclosure, I begin a series the series posts I have been threatening for a couple of months. (Coate, please don’t erase me from your Google Reader yet).

A Food Network Kind-of-Day

My typical day begins around 6:00AM each morning.  The routine goes from a shower to a latte to opening the office to CNBC.  Most days I make the rounds through the Opening Bell, to Squak on the Street, to Closing Bell, often times riding the highs and lows (mostly lows) of the market.  For some reason it makes me feel more business like, more in tune with the world, to have the markets at my fingertips or in my constant view.

But some days are just bad.  I mean so bad, so up and down (mostly down) that no good work can be done.  The Dow Jones Average can become a black hole that swallows any good idea, positive energy, or forward progress.  Those are Food Network days.  We switch over the cable to Alton Brown, Emeril, or Giada.  Throw in a little Bobby Flay or even Paula Dean and the world just seems to be a better, more comfortable, fuller place.

If you have been paying attention at all, you know Bank of America is at the heart of our banking issues in the US.  Tarp money, Merrill, congressional hearings, and most notably, falling stock prices.  I have been with BOA since they took over Nations Bank which took over Maryland National Bank.  If all goes well, I make my every other week visit to deposit what seems to be an ever shrinking check.

Thursday was BOA day.  During lunch, having had far too much of the Dow plummitting 300 points, I went to my local branch.  If you have ever been to BOA, you probably recognize the same scene from branch to branch.  The lobby is nicely situated with some couches and chairs and the 42 inch flat screen tuned to either CNBC or CNN.  Except on Thursday.  Much to my delight, as BOA stock was testing new lows once again, in my local branch…Rachel Ray and the Food Network.  Most eyes in the place were watching something flombay and for a brief moment, in one of the epicenters of our national crisis, all was good.

Here’s to Food Network Days that remind us all that despite our bank accounts or stock portfolios, every man needs to eat so you might as well eat well.

Observations From Being a Mom For a Week

My wife left early Tuesday morning heading back to Maryland to be with her father who was undergoing surgery this week.  The good news is that everything went according to plan and she is still on schedule to return home late Friday afternoon.

I learned a long time ago not to refer to these occasions of caring for my children while my wife was gone as “babysitting” (Young dads, learn from my mistake there!) but without question, my schedule becomes a bit more stressed than normal.  My daughter is 12 and my son is almost 10 so the extra time has shifted from changing diapers solo to running carpool.  Nonetheless, I enjoy these times because I get to have a first hand view into my children’s world, apart from the lens of Provider in Chief, Secretary of Discipline, or Professor Extraordinaire.

My kids are busy.  I live off my Things To Do List so I know busy when I see it.  Everyday this week, one or both of my kids have had to go to school early or stay late for clubs, make-up work, chorus, or basketball games.  I am sure I was a busy kid too, but I had forgotten how crazy that schedule was.  I am now wondering if we ingraine busyness into our children early on under the guise of making them well rounded.  I also now recognize why stopping the madness for a family meal is more crucial than ever.  Note to self.

One of the essential roles of a full-time Mother revolves around the kids’ lunches.  This has been the most eye-opening part of my week.  Here are my observations:

1 – My son eats PBJ everyday for lunch.  Can that really be healthy?  Does this contribute to the reason he does not eat vegetables?  Can he tell the difference when I put Peanut Butter on both sides of the bread and then add the jelly?  Does it really matter if I cut the crust off?

2 – My daughter confessed that she often survives on a lunch consisting only of a bag of chips (and pretzels from her friends).  I had to put my foot down on this one.  A bag of chips (even the baked Lays) is not sufficient.  Then again I often have a non-fat latte for breakfast and nothing else till dinner.  This can’t be good for either of us.

3 – When did “Chinese food” become an option for lunch?  This was my daughter’s bailout plan when I told her chips alone were not enough.  Is the Chinese food sponsored by Pei Wei?  My son continues to watch what seems to me to be Chinese/Japanese (or officially called “Anime”) cartoons.  So have the Chinese moved from buying all our US debt to taking over our kids’ cartoons and students’ lunches?

4 – When did the underground lunch trade surface?  My son packs extra fruit roll-ups because they have a higher trading value for other lunch items with his friends.  Does he have any clue or any care that “fruit roll-ups” contain no actual fruit?  Is this how we teach kids Capitalism?  Or is he the “Don” of his own lunch mafia family?

5 – Can there be any justification for middle schoolers to eat lunch at 10AM?  How is that supposed to sustain them for a whole day (especially on one bag of chips)?  Has anyone done the research to see the comparison of test scores for those who eat at 10AM vs 12PM?  I suspect those are kids being left behind.

6 – When did “Brown Bag Lunch” become “White Bag Lunch”?  Are white bags more environmentally friendly than brown ones?

7 – Has Capri Sun become the official drink of Elementary School?  My son informed me that there are two garbage cans in the lunch room set aside specifically for the disposal of Capri Suns and they were almost full.  And for what it’s worth I have never been a fan of sticking the straw in the designated hole.  I consider it one of life’s small victories when I can accomplish that task without shooting Capri Sun into my eye.

8 – In case you are wondering, inflation has hit school lunches.  (or my kids have figured out how to get bonuses to their allowances).  Before I complete this thought, I need to do some accounting.

Good thing my wife returns to her world next week, because you don’t want to hear my rants on kids TV.

Follow the Roar

On January 5, I determined 2009 was off to a good start because I finished my first book of the year.  Typically you do not describe a golf book as a page turner, but Follow the Roar by Bob Smiley was just that.

Smiley spent the first part of 2008 following Tiger Woods around from tournament to tournament, watching every competitive hole (but for 3 because his car and Tiger’s jet arrived at different times) in Tiger’s most incredible season.  For those reading for deep insight to Tiger, you will be disheartened.  The book is not about Tiger perse, but about Smiley and the adventure we all share watching golf, playing golf and loving golf from behind the ropes.

Smiley details his adventures from California to Dubai to Florida.  The shots he described I remember watching on courses I remember playing.  As I read, I was one of those Bob enountered along the way – an everyman (albeit those who know me well know I would have opted for a few more first class moments).

Tiger is a generational talent, perhaps the best ever.  But I am pretty sure, while a fan, I would not look forward to week end and out playing golf with Tiger.  However, Bob (if you read this) is welcome in my foursome anytime.  Let me know the next time you are in Vegas and we will play.

Hands down, the best golf book I have read because the author is truly one of us.

Top Ten Golf Moments of 2008

For all that 2008 lacked, it was an outstanding golf year. Tiger Woods proved again he is the best ever. Harrington represented Rotella with honors winning back-to-back British Opens and the PGA Championship. And the Ryder Cup was compelling for the first time in years, ending with a tremendous American victory.

For my friends and me, this was a great golf year too. Two once-in-a-lifetime trips to Bandon Dunes, the Nostie II in Myrtle Beach, the Pharmacy Tournament, the Super Bowl, the Las Vegas Invitational and even a VIP stint at the Wyndham Championship. Throw in a few day trips to Top 50 courses and a fall swing to Bay Hill in Orlando and 2008 may be the golf year of the decade.

In honor all the courses, the trips, the handis, and most importantly, the golfers, I offer the Top Ten Golf Moments of 2008:

10 – Laird & the Wyndham Championship

The Wyndham Championship is played in Greensboro, NC. Wyndham was one of our largest clients so my uncle and I got to go and play VIP’s at the tournament. During the Friday round, a young Scottsman named Martin Laird was playing the 18th hole as his ninth. My friends Jerry and Rick were with me in the balcony of the VIP stands watching the action. Laird marked his ball, then moved it out of the line of one of the other golfers. After that putt, Laird replaced his ball, failing to move it back to the original location. Once he putted, Jerry turns to me and says, “He didn’t move his ball back.” This begins a conversation that catches the attention of Laird and his caddy, standing right below us. Laird, hearing us, begins to question his caddy. After finding a rules official and watching the replay, he determines he did not move the ball back resulting in a two-stroke penalty. At this point we believe Jerry has cost Laird this tournament and his chance to make the Fed Ex Cup.

Laird finishes the day with a 74, but rallies making the cut by 1. He begins a run on Saturday shooting -6 and closes on Sunday shooting -7 and finishing fourth. He makes the Fed Ex and moves up the rankings finishing 34 for the season. It turns out Jerry actually saved his season in that moment as finding out later would have caused him to DQ.

Jerry also had a run in with Vijay at the hotel chastising him for missing the cut. Vijay went on the win the next three tournaments and the Fed Ex cup.

9 – The Blue Bayou

After last year’s second place finish, I got an invite back to the UGA Pharmacy Golf Tournament. Purvis, our consummate Athens host, is simply a bourbon guy. During the pre-tournament meal at Harry Bissett’s, someone ordered Purvis a blue, sweet, chick drink. Purvis also understands the value of a dollar, so while complaining at every sip, he consumed the Blue Bayou. This must have affected his tournament strategery as he determined to break up our team from the previous year. Spillman, Bearden and J Lee anchored the team that played lights out shooting -13 and winning their flight. Purvis’ A-Team finished four under. The Blue Bayou decision lingered.

8 – “You know the rules of golf”

Nostie 2008 started with an afternoon round. Waking up early and waiting all day was draining. Then nine holes into the Nostie first round at Thistle, the golf was bad and the silence was thick. I had already dumped it into the water multiple times (they don’t have much of that in Vegas).

Spillman, my riding companion, quit speaking after three holes into the round (something about Purvis’ drop location on a lateral hazard). On the tenth tee, the silence was broken. “We can play a friendly game or we can be competitive, but if we are taking then seriously, then (here it comes) YOU KNOW THE RULES OF GOLF.” It set the stage and the standard for the rules of all future Nostie competitions.

7 – Three Jack

The Nostie reinvented itself in its second year. Only four original members of the first Nostie made the cut for the Myrtle Beach version. The tournament consisted of four designated tournament rounds and two team rounds. Individual play was based on handicap where overall net score won the coveted Nostie club, the trophy reserved for the champ. In keeping with the true spirit of the Nostie, there is no money associated with the highly competed amateur title. The money was won by accumulating the most dots throughout the championship rounds.

Spillman, with his excellent play, more or less ripped the Nostie club out of Coate’s hands in the third round not to relinquish it again. Spillman rounding out play at World Tour needed only to two putt from twenty feet to add the cash to his weekend prize. As Purvis looked on, Spillman leaves his first putt short and melts under the weight of the event, missing his four foot putt and sending Purvis home with a heavier wallet.

6 – TLC & GPS

The Super Bowl was a great February event bringing Balderson and Spillman into town (we missed you, Yeatts) setting up some great golf. We opened our play at the frozen tundra that was Paiute Wolf where it took the front nine for the greens to thaw preventing every four-foot putt from traveling twenty yards. Spillman and Lee were in a tight match with Coate and Balderson as we took the action back to Spanish Trails. No one played their best golf north of Vegas, but the Trails started off with a bang. Out of the shoot Coate goes birdie, birdie. His drive on the Par five number three was BIG and as they scooted to retrieve it, the phone rang. “Uh huh. Uh huh. Okay, I’m on my way.” Turns out Coate would not complete that round as he rushed to retrieve his wife, Tanya Lee Coate, from a minor fender bender. Golf interrupted.

The next afternoon at the Super Bowl party, TLC was sharing about this new GPS she had been eyeing. Spillman bursts out, “Does it help you avoid backing into other cars?” Foreshadowing, I guess. About as smooth as three jacking for the money on hole 72.

5 – Wind

I have played in all kinds of weather, but nothing like October on Bandon Trails. We teed off that afternoon and the winds were blowing in off the coast steady at 35mph, gusting to 50mph. Rain was mixed in on every other hole. On number 14, a short, drivable par four in which the tee is elevated about 150 feet. We took out drivers and blasted them into the teeth of the wind. Long drive…120 yards. I finished the hole with a par leaving me down 2 with four to play against Spillman. With a birdie at 16 (with the wind) and a bogey at 18, Spillman and I pushed going 1-1-1 for the trip. Everybody should play Bandon. And everyone should play at least once against the fierce Oregon coast weather.

4 – Mecca

Bandon Dunes is Golf Mecca. Back in June, Spillman and I (and some other business associates) made the trek. Getting to Bandon is a chore as there are no major airports within four hours drive. The roads are winding, the people are peculiar, and it ain’t cheap but it is worth every bit of time, effort, and money to play these courses.

There are no golf carts, all walking with caddies. Set along this beautiful track of land are three of what some say are the best courses in the country. Standing on number one of Bandon Dunes preparing to tee of the first time is one of those moments etched forever in my memory. Simply unbelievable. I had high expectations that were all exceeded.

Second time that trip playing the Bandon Dunes course, I played without question to that date my best round of golf. 78, on the road, at Mecca.

3 – Renegade

The weekend following the Las Vegas Invitational, a Nostie Tour event/UGA vs South Carolina west coast tailgate, Purvis and I hooked up in Phoenix for some golf and the UGA vs Arizona St game. Golf the first day revisited the site of the inaugural Nostie, We-Ko-Pa. The course was a bit more challenging than I remembered. Purvis and I, both having been playing great golf, shot 96 a piece. Brutal.

The next day, we met up with Purvis’ fellow Georgian, Beckum, and we teed off at the private Nicholas course Desert Mountain Renegade. It is a beautiful course winding its way through the red clay foothills of Scottsdale. I thought the day could be another challenge as I hit a monster drive off number two tee, through the fairway into the shiz. Bogey. Little did I know the auspicious beginning would change golf as I knew it. Somewhere around the 8th hole, Beckum sunk a fifty-foot putt. I rained down a forty-foot putt on top of him. This was to be a special day. The final tally…71. One under par. Lots of long par saves, fairways, and birdies. Two near miss eagles attempts. Great support from my playing companions. And we finished looking back on an incredible sunset. I may never walk that road again, but I will never forget it.

As an aside, Purvis shot an 80 to cap off an incredible two-day turn around and the Dawgs won.

2 – Thud!

The Las Vegas Invitational, a Nostie Tour event, brought Nostie vets and newcomers together for some practice rounds and two tournament rounds. Purvis played well getting off the plane the first day. Coate stayed steady through the event. Spillman needed a good comeback day two to make a run. Hirsch met some new friends. Balderson was a monster from the desert. Bearden doesn’t like desert golf. And I played lights out.

On hole 36, we played number 18 at Revere Concord. It is a downhill Par 5 with a deep creek running in front of the green. It is one of those holes where you hope for a great drive because you want to go for it. After a good drive, I have a 15 foot snake of a birdie putt. While our second group was watching from the fairway, I drained the putt to secure the win. As we walked back to the cart, Balderson was giving a heartfelt congratulations when “Thud!” and TB goes down. Coate, from 200 yards out, hooks a five iron into Balderson’s cheek. Fortunately TB was talking and the Titliest hit him in the soft spot created when you open your mouth. Inches from disaster.

Fortunately, it did not slow down the UGA Tailgate West. Rick enjoyed the margaritas. And again, Dawgs win.

1 – The Putt

Norman Course. Team event day two. Nine holes. Best ball followed by alternate shot followed by scramble. Spillman/Lee vs Purvis/Coate. Holes 91-99 for the week. We are wiped. Last hole, tied. Short par 3, downhill, wind. Play it once, all square. We go back to the tee. After not completing a swing in three holes, I stick the shot five feet from the pin. Purvis/Coate are best shot 60 feet away. In the cart on the way to the green Spillman and I are recording on the flip what our meals will be that night at Norman’s Grill that the others guys would be paying for. And then the unthinkable.

Spillman makes our birdie. Back to the tee. They stick the shot, make the putt, and it’s over. Unbelievable.

I expect 2009 to be a better year all around. I hope that the golf moments add to the lore of our friendships and that there will be more moments that we will still be remembering at Nostie XXX.

One Year Ago Today…

I boarded an early morning flight from Raleigh, North Carolina headed to Des Moines, the host of the nation’s first battleground for the most historic election of my lifetime.

I love politics.  I am a political guy.  And for the better part of one week last December, I was a political tourist.  I braved the snow and cold and fatigue to discover a great American city that carries their national role of the first caucus of the Presidential primary season with great pride.  I listened to and shook hands with Rudy Giuliani, Bill Richardson, John Edwards, Frank Thompson, and Barack Obama.

Much has changed in our world since then.  While I knew this election would be historic, I had no way of knowing the true significance of choosing that person who would lead our country through some of its most challenging days.

This is typically the time of year when many people look backwards and forwards, remembering and forecasting.  It is one of my favorite weeks of the year because introspection is the rule.

Jefferson-Jackson Dinner.  Iowa.  New York Giants.  New Hampshire.  Nice Enough.  Huckabee.  Iraq.  Drivers Licenses for Illegals.  South Carolina.  Even Jesse Jackson won.  Romney.  Florida.  McCain.  New York Governor.  Delegates.  Super Delegates.  AIG.  Merrill Lynch.  Illinois Governor.  Bailouts.  Paulson.  Bernacke…(to be continued)

I am presently reading a wonderful book, Follow the Roar (by Bob Smiley).  Smiley chronicles his journey of follow Tiger Woods around for Tiger’s fantastic and shortened season.  It makes me wish I would have written more about my Iowa adventure.  Maybe next time.  And there will be a next time.

To There and Back Again

(This post is in response to the Dan Kimball/David Fitch/Alan Hirsch/Lee Coate conversation and continued from the comment section on Coate’s blog)

Well here we go again. We have changed the names of the movements/philosophies and are repeating the cycle.

When I was in seminary (mid to late-90’s), Dale Galloway was moving toward the end of his formal advocacy of the cell church and Willow Creek and Saddleback were writing their books on how to be a seeker or seeker-sensitive church. We dismissed Galloway as having imported Eastern practice of small groups or cells from Korea and Pastor Cho recognizing the organizing in response to persecution may have some unique qualities that did not work as well in the West. Instead, we embraced the new mega model and replicated it as fast as possible.

Then there was a new group – Gen X’ers/Postmoderns that revolted against Willow World, the conferences, the books, the philosophy. We then held our own conferences, wrote our own books and perpetuated our own philosophies.

My dad (an SBC pastor and denominational exec) told me at that point that he had seen this kind of movement before, in the 60’s, anti-institutional, the young having their day. I, of course, thought my dad was missing it, stuck in his tradition, bound by his denominational ties that bind.

Then Postmoderns began emerging. Emergers became organic. Now the organics are becoming missional. (My apologies for the movements I missed – I have been in exile in the desert the last few years)

I started a church in Maryland (the area John Wesley called “the most Gospel adverse place” he had been to in his life) that was a good church. A bit attractional. A lot Gen-X. Became a bit post-modern. A church in the blur. I left that church after five years seeking to touch and feel and experience this emergent, house church movement longing for my place in the new kind of church. I moved to Las Vegas and with some friends, started a version of this organic church – one authentic to what we believed church was to become and how it was to function in this new world.

And we found it leaving us wanting.

After an extended period moving from the cutting edge to the outskirts of organized church, I found Spencer Burke’s “church in the park” to leave me wanting. And now I have come back to the beginning as a part of a large church (dare I say mega) that is still wrestling with how to be missional in Las Vegas.

After five years I can admit what I have admitted so many times before – my dad was right. We have been this way before.

I think I our culture has changed in that these cycles happen much more quickly. We are on the way to something and these new versions are moving us there. I still hold onto much of my post-modern theology and philosphy, but I suggest to Fitch that his two types of practitioners (attractional and missional) are really two different types of practitioners (the ones who have been doing it one way and the ones who want to do it a new way). These two types have always spoken past each other and the truth is there is room for both.

I love reading Frost and Hirsch. My friend has spent some extended time with Alan Hirsch and recounts him as a truly great guy to be around. These Australian theologians have inspired me at times. And they need to be a part of the conversation. But in the not too distant future, there will be post-missional people who will critique the missional people and the emerging and organic crowds will still be looking for some blog time. The post-moderns haven’t gone away (more likely we have just grown older).

So what has really changed? One, all of these voices exist at the same time. In generations past, there would typically only be two schools of thought existing at the same time. (The thesis and the anti-thesis which create synthesis that becomes the new thesis). Now things change so fast and communication happens instantly so that new philosophies are born and morph and die constantly (what happened to Neil Cole’s Organic Church – that went fast).

Two, we have changed or more appropriately, I have changed.

I love what Joe Boyd wrote yesterday. “The full circle journey taught me many things…Some of my house church friends, no doubt, worry about my soul now…the same way my organized church friends worried about me in my house church days. The truth is I am a hybrid.”

Aren’t we all hybrids, really? Isn’t our culture a blur of modern and post-modern? Unchurched and over-churched? Christendom and post-Christendom? And don’t we all have a role to play? Shouldn’t we all just hold hands…okay, you get the point.

When I was young, I had it all figured out. And I have had to unlearn it all everyday since.

The conversation is important. The angst is necessary I guess, although can be destructive relationally. And yes, Jeff Henson, it is a very bad thing for people to start churches out of the angst for the established church.

But I appreciate that the missional crowd (David Bosch, one of the original missioligists, would be proud) has returned the conversation to moving the Kingdom forward. But recognize we are all trying. Those in the park, in the house, in the pew, in the coffee shop and yes, even in the booth wearing the headset directing the show. And my almost 37 years of experience in this “church” world is sure of one thing – hold all things loosely because when you believe you have figured it out, you stand the greatest chance to miss the real mission of it all.

It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Well, maybe not for many people.  At least not this year.

There is a very different Christmas season on the horizon.  Most experts believe that retailers will suffer their worst holiday sales in many years.  This year most of us do not need the holidays to add extra stress to our lives.  Shopping will not be as fun as in years past as I expect your family, like mine, are counting every dime and scaling back Christmas purchases.  Very few expect Christmas bonuses.  Many, like our family, can not afford to travel home.  Even in Hollywood (I read this morning) they are scaling back the number and grandeur of their holiday parties.

The typical “good will” that begins to arise these couple of weeks before Thanksgiving is being choked out by the worries of shrinking bank accounts, an uncertain political and financial outlook, and even the reality of losing our own jobs.  (On top of that, they have put the Christmas lights up in our neighborhood and instead of a couple of extra weeks to enjoy them, considering most people might need the extra time to embrace the Spirit this year, someone complained and now they have to hold fast to the thirty day rule for putting up holiday decorations – Fascists)  If you weren’t depressed yet, I may have just pushed you over the edge.  Sorry, I’ll try to do better.

I am a Christmas guy.  With few exceptions, I typically find a way to make this time of year special, memorable, and intrinsically rewarding.  And as a preacher-type, I have long railed against the commercialization that typically envelopes the whole Christmas season.  So I actually believe the current state of economic crisis may be a gift to us Christmas purists.  Track with me for a moment.

Our Christmas shopping is almost done.  Fewer dollars yield fewer gifts.  (Like many Americans, we cashed in credit card rewards points to cover most of it.)  No real travel concerns.  Fewer distractions.  More evenings at home, sitting by the fire (yes, even in Las Vegas) drinking hot chocolate or a nice glass of wine.  More time for family.  More meals together.  The incentive to enjoy the cheaper/free parts of Christmas like riding around looking at lights.  I have already made plans to help serve at our Christmas Eve services when typically I am on an airplane. Perhaps there is a potential that our focus during this Christmas might actually return to its original intent.  The Christ child in the manger.  Giving instead of receiving.  The Love of family.  The Joy of sharing a meal with our neighbors.  The Peace of many silent nights reading a book, sharing conversation with my kids, snuggling with my wife.

In case you’re looking for suggestions on how to enjoy a fiscally scaled down, yet possibly even better Christmas than the last few, I have some thoughts:

1 – Start early.  Decorate before Thanksgiving.  Make your own decorations (Wendy and the kids are making wreaths this weekend and the kids could not be more excited.)  Go ahead and find the holiday music and throw it on the ipod.

2 – Read the Christmas story from Matthew or Luke once each week.  Make a list of all that you have to be grateful for.  Share it with your wife and kids.  Make them a part.  Get an advent calendar (saw one at Starbucks this morning) and count down with great expectation.

3 – Find a real opportunity to give something away.  Give away your time in service to your city or church.  Give away some of your stuff.  Simplify and de-clutter.  Give away your money.  For those that have it, share it, because there are many this year that do not.

4 – Eat a family meal together at least twice a week.  Take turns making your favorite meals.  Let the kids help cook.  Create memories that latch themselves forever in your kids minds to the family’s favorite dishes.

5 – Don’t overspend.  If there was ever a time that people would appreciate your presence more than your presents, it’s this year.  Cut out gift swapping with the adult members of your family.  Everybody will appreciate the release from the obligation.  (This doesn’t mean your spouse.  Something simple, but something is a necessity.)

6 – Take time to see the lights.  Put the XM radio on the holiday music and take the scenic route home.  Often.

7 – Plan to find or host a Christmas Eve gathering that helps the whole family embrace the birth of Christ.  Perhaps more so than any other time in my life, we have the opportunity for Jesus’ birth not to be crowded out by the parties, the shopping, the gift giving, and the madness of it all.

8 – Don’t watch the news.  Remember every news organization has to pay the bills by getting you to watch.  The worse their news is, the more we watch.  Break that cycle for the holidays.  Fast from the news.  Your 401k (or what’s left of it) will be there in January 2009 for you to fret about.

9 – Take every opportunity to spend time with your family.

My hope is that we actually discover what the Grinch learned after he thought he had stolen Christmas.

So he paused. And the Grinch put his hand to his ear.
And he did hear a sound rising over the snow.
It started in low. Then it started to grow.
But the sound wasn’t sad! Why, this sound sounded merry!
It couldn’t be so! But it WAS merry! VERY!
He stared down at Whoville! The Grinch popped his eyes!
Then he shook! What he saw was a shocking surprise!
Every Who down in Whoville, the tall and the small,
Was singing! Without any presents at all!
He HADN’T stopped Christmas from coming! IT CAME!
Somehow or other, it came just the same!

Confessions of a “Former” Country Club Member

The credit crunch and financial tsunami got very real for me last week.  Our small business has become smaller as we have downsized our company.  Along with the swarm of cutbacks, we resigned our country club membership.

Now I expect some of you might (rightfully so) say it is a small price to pay to survive.  Others of you, however, will mourn with me.  So in memory of my four plus years playing country club golf, I offer my Top 10 Memories, Moments & Meltdowns:

10 – The Gate Natzi on countless occassions holding up my frequent guests acting as a consistent reminder that Spanish Trails is an exclusive club (the original Gate Natzi moved on several months ago and access became much simpler, but we give her a shout out anyway)

9 – This year was the first Halloween we trick-or-treated around our own home.  Each year prior, we made the rounds inside the gates.  Actually inside the gates inside the gates.  Most years we herded the Lee’s and the McClendon’s often times with guest appearances by the Coates, Gunhus’, and even the Spillman’s.  The houses at the Trails were huge, taking up entire blocks.  What it lacked in quantity of houses was made up in quality (size) of the candy for the kids.  And as my wife has reminded me, the Wine Tasting Dinner’s were also exceptional – both for the wine, the food, and even more, my companion.  Great events.

8 – I have only made three eagles in my golfing career.  The first of them took place on Canyon 6.  It is a tricky par 5 that following a good drive and well placed approach shot, I hit a nine iron from 133 yards that landed and sucked back into the hole.

7 – Spring and Fall Fridays had their own routine.  Coffee in the morning.  A quick stop by the office.  11AM tee time.  Finish the round by 2:30 and to the grille as they roll out the hors d’oeuvres at 3PM.  On the cooler Winter Fridays, we added the mid round bowl of chili.  Those were good days.

6 – One of the great things about being a member of a private club in Las Vegas is that you have a good chance of having some famous co-members.  We had a Malouf, a Kneivel, a Ghogan, but most famous was Greg Maddux.  As a huge Braves fan, it was a treat to see a baseball hero during the offseason.  The day John Smoltz came to play at the club was more than a pleasant surprise.  But the truth is, Maddux and I competed for the early tee times.  See Maddux, being a celebrity, always had a fivesome.  By itself, it is a little slower.  Add to that the nervous energy many of his playing partners would have playing golf with a legend and being caught behind his group could mean a long day.

5 – I love July 4th in Vegas.  The way the valley is situated, the evening time allows you to see fireworks popping up all over.  One of my favorite mid-summer routines was a July 4th (HOT) round of golf followed by the cookout and then fireworks out on the driving range.  And Piekarski working on Davies’ back (they had just met that day) on the 17th was priceless.

4 – Lee Coate is a 3 handicap.  Whatever he tells you, I know the truth.  Now that doesn’t mean he can’t have a bad day.  But one of my favorite memories was watching Coate shoot even par at the Trails – twice.

3 – Spillman’s stint in Las Vegas was brief, but strong.  While he was here, he, Coate and I played just about every week.  The matches were sensational, but no more so than Spillman’s last round as a resident right before he and Coate were both moving from the desert.  We had played 18 holes to a draw.  So we went back to play the 18th again and again we pushed.  Back to the tee one last time on number 9 on Sunrise.  Spillman hit his approach shot into what is now named the “Spillman Bunker” and proceeded to putt out of the sand into the hole.  Incredible shot.

2 – It was no ordinary meltdown.  I had played the first of three rounds of my first Club Championship.  I shot an 81 and with my 11 handicap was leading the tournament by five shots.  That incuding an 8 on the par five Lakes 2.  Day 2 started as day 1 ended.  I was on fire and had around an 8 shot lead heading into hole 16.  Then something changed.  I bogeyed that hole, missed an easy birdie on the par 5 17th and then doubled the 18th for an 83.  That including a 9 on the par 5 Lakes 2.  (catching the trend)  Day 3 I took a six stroke lead into the final round playing with the leaders in my group.  My second hole was the par 5 Lakes 2.  After another 9 I led the tournament by a single stroke that would soon be lost the next hole.  I finished third by 3 strokes with a combined 11 shots over on one single hole.

1 – The third to the last round I played at the trails (little did I know at the time) was the only time I scored in the 70’s on my home course.  Bearden, Balderson, Spillman, (and even Coate for nine holes) were with me as I closed out a 78 bogey, bogey.  To that date (prior to winning the Las Vegas Invitational – a Nostie Tour event – followed by a 71 the following weekend with Purvis in Scottsdale) was the best round of my life.

Thanks to the many of you who were my guests.  Hirsch, Henson, Balderson, Bearden, Butters, Hopler, Davies, Piekarski, Yeatts, Johnson, Keck, Sayles, Dad, Spillman, Coate and I am sure many more.  I would never want to be a country club guy without my friends.  And I know you all hope I become a country club guy again very soon.

Here’s to a good economy!!